When counseling a couple, the therapist is trained to employ various schools of social and psychological perspective. My training included: gestalt family therapy, systems therapy, and interpersonal therapy. I worked in professional settings where these models of couples counseling were taught, practiced, and supervised. A short bibliography of some of the experts in these models is available at the link to the right.
Many married and unmarried couples that have worked with me have referred their friends and relatives. I observed that if we three can work together well the couple could demonstrate, in the conduct of their daily lives, that they were gaining specific skills that had a direct impact on the way they conducted themselves when they were together.
Examples of this included demonstrating increasing self- and other-awareness, disrupting their own problem-causing behaviors repeatedly, and practicing a way of speaking to their partner that was less provocative and more effective in problem solving, negotiating, compromising, and listening. An important example too was regarding emotional self-regulation, doing this effectively and in ways that are safe and healthy. An overview of the type of work I do with couples is available at the right.